Thursday, May 5, 2011

Waterforms at the Theosophical Society, late 2000s

As the title suggests, I once heard something at the Theosophical Society Baltimore that blew my mind. For those of you who don't know, the T.S. is a large library and quite airy lecture hall situated very near Washington memorial park in down-uptown Baltimore. It has been running consistently for at least a century, and the centurions there indeed will put you on the right path, whatever it is for you.

In the library they have many books by founders and mystics, including Blavatsky, the smoker-trancer of the 19th century, but NOT including Steiner, who founded Anthroposophic society. Don't go looking for Anthroposophic books in a Theosoph's house, I learned swiftly.

On the Sunday afternoon in question, we were gathered in the lecture hall, pastel blue, with good light streaming in from outside spring weather, and not much humidity in the air. The old dusty piano was poised in the corner with many mystic posters lying on top of it.

Doctor Oleg Yakso, who looks mafia, from somewhere in Russia, presented on "water". We in the westside arts district had been on a roll with the Theosophical, a good place to think about your art project at the same time as talk spirits; the topic of "water" immediately charged us to be there or be square.

He began with a spoken introduction on how water is a dynamic meta-material, which can easily form molecular structures reflecting the energy forms near it, such as emotions projected by people. Dr. Yakso then showed a video on the topic of "water". Japanese artist who makes snowflakes in the presence of emotions- they make different shapes. The video went on and it became obvious that it was a BBC documentary of some sort that explained in graphics, how water molecules can organize into any shape, strung together on their polarities like Polystyrene. Suddenly, what's this? The video has changed tone, and now the narrator's accent is Russian:

"Doctor Oleg Yakso has perfected the distilling, preservation, and bottling of morphic waters, appropriate for any occasion, crisis, or need" -This was an advertisement for his potions, to be on sale in the lobby. No one was to buy any except the oldest centurions there. I started sniffing out a question to ask him during Q+A. Here's what I came up with:

"OK, so you are programming waters by emotions. How are you doing this? Seems like you would simply have a factory of quality people, who are staring at bottled waters all day and your job as manager is to make sure they're all happy!"

To this question, Dr. Yakso responded with a description of his true, secret process, something very grim. Something that if truly is practiced, in the cold swamps of Siberia, could mean that we humans are capable of creating any reality here on this planet. Here is that secret:

"No, you see, at one point I was dying, my friend. I went to the doctor and he said I was dying. Then I found another doctor, who told me to eat spirulina, and go on a diet of only green. I did this and I stopped dying. I went back to that doctor and said, 'my friend, do you want to make a lot of money?'

You see, the spirulina is bottled inside the juice, and it is in a preserved in a state of dying. This doctor that I met, he found that whenever a root of a plant, or a small bacteria, when it is dying, it makes ultraviolet energy. This ultraviolet energy is because it is dying.

What we do, is we take an organismo that is dying, and preserve it in a bottle, we hermetically seal it. The organism is thus in a perpetual state of death. It is always emitting ultraviolet soul-wind, through the walls of the bottle, and in to another bottle of pure water. This is how we program the waters"

The room was silent. I thought immediately- doesn't glass filter out ultraviolet? One stupid qualm against a huge mammoth of alternative science. Sovietism! Akademgorad! Kirlian! The strength of his lesson was squashing. He turned on the video again, and ended with this fine piece of positivist speculation:

When water freezes, any morphic resonances or meta-structures are destroyed by the expansion and cubic crystallization effects of water. You can notice this in meat which has been frozen and thawed many times over, which has the effect of tenderizing it for the wolf. Thus, ice water is like a clean slate energetically, and could have quite a healing effect in its Zenness.

And we have no dearth of recently thawed ice water- that our receding polar ice is giving us pure energy is invigorating to the new ager in me, and I shed a fresh tear of emotionful water, to drop in our oceans of thaw.


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